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You only needed one gear if you were on the first Perth Cafe Racer Run for 2012, held Sunday 9th Jan.
The roads were looong and straight and the only fun to be had was with the right hand, (much like when the wife is away).
Friday night and I thought it’d me and 5 other Perth Cafe Reprobates Racers. Rock up to “The Lounge Room” at Guildford and there are 20 bikes there!
I really should have prepared for the ride. I get off the bike and order a long macchiato (I heard they were trendy). Meet all the new guys and promptly forgot all their names. I was too busy trying to work out how the hell we were going to get out of Guildford!
Hands shaken, coffees drunk, names forgotten and it was time to rumble Guildford’s foundations to the ground. Not hard when you have a Victory Hammer and a Yamaha Warrior along for the ride!
We weren’t the only ones taking our toys out for a spin.
We head out of Guildford and immediately get lost. One benefit of not having a group communication system is no one could hear me swearing. Eventually found our way to Toodyay Road and into top gear.
Don’t be fooled by the above map East Coast Criminals. A Hayabusa could pop it into top gear and wind it open all the way to point B - Toodyay.
The only bike to get pinged for speeding on the last double points day of the holidays was an MV Augusta F4 at the back of the pack! The cop was decent enough to drop the speed 20km/h on the ticket down to 101km/h in a 90 zone…but come on man…the bike can do 300km/h+.
I forgot to explain the marking system so everybody just thought Geoff had broken down on his Ducati (as one does) at the turn off and followed me into Toodyay for petrol and a BS session.
A quick sprint into Northam for lunch saw us all with aching right hands. Again, don’t be fooled by that map East Coast Carpetmunchers, you only needed one gear from Point B to Point C - Northam.
Hey, Northam Council, Christmas finished 2 weeks ago, take the decorations down!
Best Italian in Perth. True Story.
Time for Lunch
Stevo knockin’em back
A good steak sandwich at Northam Tavern could have been great. Who eats Processed cheese other than bogans and 5 year olds?
We left this lot and headed for York. How may gears do your reckon we needed?
That’s right East Coast Coochies, just the one. Who needs the salt flats when you have Perth country roads eh!
Doing 18km/h and having someone pass you at 19km/h is fun, especially when your jacket zip gives up after the air catches it and it acts as a parachute. When we stopped and waited for the sportsbikes to arrive, I swear I could hear the engines begging for mercy. Hell, even a little Hyosung hit 16.1km/h and wasn’t he happy!
York was closed, (of course it was, it was a Sunday. No Sunday trading here in WA) and it was 2pm and would be dark soon (no daylight saving here either. For some reason, people in WA like to have sunrise at 4:30am. They’re freakin weird I tell ya) so we headed home nice an easy.
We clicked into top gear one last time and waved at the forward facing revenue raiser as we rode out of town.
Want to see some GoPro video of the run? Sorry, I’m a numpty, all I’ve got is this pic of me turning my GoPro off.
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Starting at The Lounge Room cafe at Guildford, WA at 10am
…and maybe following this route. About 200kms.
We’ll stop for lunch if we find some roadkill.
Cafe Racers, Customs, Bobbers, Trackers, Classics, Retro’s welcome.
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My bike does a ride by and scares the shit out of a kangaroo.
Can’t wait until it is on song.
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“Hey, is this yours? I used to own a Trumpy”
If you buy a Triumph Thruxton, get ready to have every guy who ever owned an old bike come up and tell you about all the old bikes he ever owned.
We all rocked up on time at Green & Cock Leederville. Route was explained and I showed the newbies where we were going to lose them.
10:30am and it is time …
Me: “Ok, let’s roll”
Newbie Scott: “I just have to get petrol first”
Newbie Wayne: “That’s a yellow card isn’t it?”
I turned my GoPro on but of course I had forgotten to charge it so unfortunately I can’t provide footage of us booming through the city although it looked something like this…
An uneventful ride to our first pit-stop at Shell Kalamunda where we hooked up with Simon of Man, Bike, Spanner. From there it was ride at your own pace to the shittiest pub in the Perth hills, the one star (only because you can’t give it no stars) Mundaring Weir Pub. The crew split into two groups straight away with PK on his Ducati Sport Classic, HDK on his Thruxton and Simon on his Speed Triple up the front.
Wayne on his 900ss led the next group with Paul on his Ducati 620 sport, Benny Bones on his Bonny, Viv and Scott on their VTR’s and Olyflyer was up the rear…his excuse is that he was taking photos but we haven’t seen proof…
I went up a side road and waited for them all to come past and chased them down on Shaken Fist. Even though it hasn’t been tuned yet, we were pumpin hard and we caught the leaders as we headed into the pub.
^Hey, have you heard about this new app, Angry birds?
Wayne’s 900ss clutch gave up so he stayed behind with HDK. From there we headed back to Kalamunda and tuned off towards Bickley. Great sweeping road that we’ll do again. We then made our way to Canning Dam for photos and to tell each other how close we came to crashing etc.
^As the speeds picked up so did the bullshit!
^Viv, offering herself to Shaken Fist…
^Benny Bones checking out the dead cow skins
…and then this Kangaroo jumped out in front of me….
^5 minutes later, the speedo needle would be off this dial. It is sooo not calibrated…
^You can work out who is saying what…
^Let’s roll mofos
Google maps says it’d take 39mins to do the 35.8kms from the dam to Jarrahdale Tavern. 14 minutes after leaving the dam we sat down for lunch.
^PK looking very happy with himself
Lunchtime topics of discussion
Food polished off it was time to head home. One last sprint before civilisation and a top up of fuel.
We have a special guest coming on the next run this weekend so come along.
Join the Perth Cafe Racer Facebook Group for regular ride updates and ….stuff
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Meet here 10am for 10:30am start.
Cafe racers, customs, retros, trackers, bobbers, choppers even muletards welcome.
Bring your chains and nunchucks for a game of road rash in the tunnel…ok, maybe not.
Weirs, dams, bridges, forests and high speeds will be involved.
Will be finished by 4pm at the latest. <200kms - route will be shared over morning coffee.
Join the Perth Cafe Racer facebook page
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We are heading up to Yanchep National Park for the GOODFELLAS Hot Rod Show.
Meet at Kingsway Shopping Centre, cnr Hepburn Avenue and Wanneroo Road, Kingsway from 10am. Depart at 10.30am for a leisurely ride (with 200+ Hot Rods) North to Yanchep National Park and the historic Yanchep Inn.
We’ll be the guys in the carpark on ….um….cafe racers.
If you want to come but don’t have a ride, we have a loan bike - a fun little CB400f
It’s yours for the day as long as you meet our strict guidelines
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Some footage of the recent cafe run held in Perth. Camera is attached to the chain guard on a W650. Watch out for the angry gardener